The Results, 11/14/2013 + The Matchups, 11/15/2013

Before I delve into my fantasy basketball misery today, I’d like to take a moment to wish my dad, Jay Martin, a happy 60th birthday! It’s been a tough year for the family, to say the least, but my dad, as always, has been a rock throughout.

Thanks for being born, dad. Without you, there’d be no me.

Enough with the sappy stuff. Let’s get down to business, shall we?

The Derrick Rosie O’Donnells

Screen Shot 2013-11-15 at 11.55.46 AM

Swaggy E

Screen Shot 2013-11-15 at 11.55.55 AM

Matchup Scoreboard

Screen Shot 2013-11-15 at 11.55.37 AM

ANALYSIS

Good news! Serge Ibaka had (perhaps) his best game of the season so far: 27 points (9-of-14 from the field, 9-of-9 from the line), 13 rebounds and three blocks during the Oklahoma City Thunder‘s thrilling defeat to the Golden State Warriors.

Bad news: Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook did what Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook usually do—score 20-plus apiece and stuff the stat sheet.

Worse news: Omer Asik didn’t get off the bench for the Houston Rockets against the New York Knicks, even after Greg Smith left the game with a leg injury. All the while, Chandler Parsons and Terrence Jones (both of whom play for Swaggy E in the virtual world) combined for 28 points, 10 rebounds, four assists and three steals.

For those of you keeping score at home, that means my opponent’s two lesser lights of the evening combined to produce about as much value as did my one and only participating player.

Which, in turn, makes the big numbers posted by Durant and Westbrook, in essence, icing on my cake of sadness and (largely self-inflicted) despair.

Will things get better tonight? You be the judge…

The Derrick Rosie O’Donnells

Screen Shot 2013-11-15 at 12.02.13 PM

Swaggy E

Screen Shot 2013-11-15 at 12.02.20 PM

ANALYSIS

At least the Thunder are taking the night off. I’d also be surprised if the two Milwaukee Bucks on Ethan’s roster (Nate Wolters and Khris Middleton) muster much against the Indiana Pacers’ historically awesome defense. Ditto for Enes Kanter opposite the San Antonio Spurs’ studly front line.

With any luck, Joakim Noah will have a block part in Toronto and Paul Pierce and Goran Dragic will combine for all of the threes…

Nah, who am I kiddin’?

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go tailgate my fantasy basketball sorrows away in celebration of my beloved UCLA Bruins’ “Freaky Friday” Pac-12 clash with Washington at the Rose Bowl. Should be a good day.

Just not for my D-RODs. :,(

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